And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
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