We're facebook friends in real life
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
