We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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