I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
