Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
