i barfeds in our rink
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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