I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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