You can't motorboat a personality
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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