and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
you win again, gameday.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
