she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
