you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
