What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
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all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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