dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
