i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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