I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Randomize
