U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize