You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
