In the future we'll all be gay
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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