Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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