you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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