just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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