i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
