dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
