I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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