i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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