You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
You are a booty call, not a friend.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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