She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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