distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
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