Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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