If i could tip my vagina, i would.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
