brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Randomize
