A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
