fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
