What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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