When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
