Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
