Define "chronic" masturbator.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
