He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
