i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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