my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
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