Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Randomize
