All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Pappa wants mamma naked
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
You made out with two different species that night
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Randomize
