Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
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