remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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