Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
You're a waste of cheezeits
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
