What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
