I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
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