Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Randomize
