I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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