I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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