Cold hands, warm shart.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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