I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
