that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
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he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
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It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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